Bode at 18 months, Geneva at almost 5.

Bode just turned 18 months old so I figure it's time to run down our kids many charming qualities.  He's still a huge kid 35 inches and 30 pounds. That's 100th percentile height and weight by standard suspicious doctor-math.  He's a sweet kid - seldom fusses or cries.  He learned to walk at one year old and basically skipped straight on to running after that.  He loves to go outside and has quickly learned that if he wants to go out he has to get his shoes first. He'll be looking longingly out the back door and we'll tell him he needs his shoes and he'll trot off to get them. He's at that age where he understands much more than he can say. He says very few words but understands quite complex ideas.  Currently his words are hot (used for the BBQ and hotdogs), "ba" (ball or bird depending on context), Mama, hi, China (the little dog next door), "uck" (truck, or stuck, again depending on context), bye, agua.  It's a little on the low side for word count in a kid his age but with all the big talkers in this house I'm just not worried.  He also signs more, all done, and water as well as pointing at things he wants, so all told we communicate pretty effectively. 

Bode loves the iDevices already - he knows how to unlock our phones and iPad and plays the Toca Boca robot game (with help from his sister).  It feels like a parenting cheat but it'll sure be handy when we can entertain him on an airplane with one of these.  Then we'll feel like we can travel again.  I want to visit relatives in Chicago, DC, and I'm sure other places.

Geneva is almost five and tends towards the dramatic side.  We have a lot of conversations about using polite tone of voice and using words in general (instead of tantrums) to get what you want.  I'd say things are better than about 6 months ago when her tantrums would last for an hour but we've been having lots of calls from school about her talking back to the teachers.  We started a sticker behavior chart but it's still been tough going.  My mom thinks the current daycare isn't stimulating enough for Geneva and we looked at another daycare in the area.  It looked nice - the decor was straight out of a Pottery Barn Kids catalog.  But it was partial day, only 9 months of the year, and cost $20k.  I just couldn't stomach it even with "financial aid."  Maybe I made a mistake and she would have been happier there but it's hard to know.

We have an argument almost every weekend on Saturday morning with Geneva.  Chris and I want to go out to the farmers' market with the kids and Geneva really wants nothing in this world more than to sit around the entire day watching cartoons in her underwear.  I think I'm going to have to hold out hope that Bode is the adventure kid. 

Bode and Geneva are still getting along great.  In August we went to Idaho for vacation and we had the kids sleep in the same room.  It went well so when we got home we put them in the same room here as well.  We're very surprised at the outcome, but Geneva actually sleeps quite a bit better with him in the same room. She goes to bed earlier, is quieter when she goes, and sleeps later.  I'd say she's averaging 1-1.5 hours more sleep per day with him in the room!  If she's noisy at all at bedtime we tell her that if she's noisy she'll have to sleep in a different room and she calms right down. She just really loves having another kid in the room with her. Also Bode almost always sleeps completely through the night. We had thought that Geneva was a good sleeper but that's just because we didn't realize how good it could be.  We very seldom have to go in to help Bode in the night and it's usually just because it's cold and he's uncovered or he got twisted in the covers or something.  At 3 1/2 years old Geneva still woke up in the night almost every night. We'd just need to pat her to get her to go back to sleep but that's still a lot of nights without straight sleep. The kids play well together too - there are occasional tussles with them both wanting the same toy (in fact Bode typically just wants whatever Geneva has) but mostly we've taught Geneva how to deal with it and it's not that big a deal.

Vacation in Idaho was really nice.  We did a ton of fun things like visit the water park, biking, horseback riding, swim in the lake, canoeing.  Unfortunately I got some weird headache disease while I was there (crazy crazy headache for 36 hours) and then when that cleared up I discovered a lump in my breast (which turned out to be a galactocele - i.e. no big deal) but my health is my biggest stress trigger so I was having a hard time enjoying myself.  Also Bode then got my headache disease only his manifested as a high fever with no other symptoms so I spent a good bit of time worrying about him (and at the emergency room trying to figure out if he had an ear infection).  

It was so beautiful in Idaho in the summer - we almost never go there that time of year so we had forgotten.  That and the total emergency room bill ($150. Last time we took Geneva to an ER in California it cost the insurance $3000) made us start thinking again about maybe retiring early to Idaho. Just relax and do fun stuff all the time.  Too bad I love California so much. And I'd probably be bored without an official job.

A couple of months ago we got a new bike contraption.  It's an extender to the back of one of our diamond frame bikes (Xtracycle) and we got these seats and rails that will hold up to 3 kids and both of ours just love it.  Sometimes Bode is so desperate to go on a ride that we strap him in and just take him around the block so he'll get a ride in. I think he even understands that he has to wear a helmet while riding so while he hates to wear it he'll do it anyway because he knows we'll pull him off the bike if he doesn't.  I keep seeing videos/photos of Geneva's little friends riding 2-wheel bikes so I think it's time to try to teach her.  I'm not gonna be too surprised though if she's not interested in learning.

Yosemite

So Yosemite was terrible and fabulous and I'm already mentally circling items in the REI catalog and pondering when Bode will be old enough that he sleeps like a normal person and we can go back.

The terrible part was that we put Bode to bed in his pack and play at 7pm and he woke up around midnight and basically didn't sleep again after that.  I thought bringing him into bed with Chris and I would keep him calm and it did, but it seemed to also preclude sleep.  I did it anyway because we were staying in the tent cabins in Curry Village and letting him cry at all would mean waking up like 100 people.  So basically I didn't sleep at all starting around midnight that day and at 4:30 gave up and got up with Bode and tried to just feel grateful that at least the sun rose really early and Yosemite is a beautiful place to see a sunrise.

So we can't go back until Bode can sleep like a normal person.  And when we go back I want to do actual tent camping.  We went through the Lower Pines campground and it was so much nicer than Curry Village.  You have to bring your own tent and gear but it's much less densely packed and just seemed all around more peaceful.  Hence the tent/REI shopping I'm mentally doing.

So Bode and I hiked to Yosemite Falls for sunrise (that little brat slept the whole way, only waking up when we arrived at the falls and I stopped pushing and was about to lay down on a bench to snooze).  And of course it was phenomenally beautiful.  Then we walked back to CV and picked up Geneva who was wide awake also and we all went and had breakfast together in the center of camp and then I couldn't stand it any more and went and woke everyone else up and made them get ready to go.

Oh, I should mention that the only thing that kept me chill in the 4:30-9am hours was my resolution that we were NOT staying a second night no matter what we had paid for it.  Turns out CV is so easy for Yosemite to fill that they give a full refund as long as you check out by 11am.  After we were packed up, Yenny, Geneva and I took the bus to Happy Isles for the Nevada Falls hike.  This was her favorite part of the entire trip.  That kid, I swear.  Sometimes I can't understand how she can be related to me.  Hates hiking, loves riding buses.  We had brought the folder bike and the jogging stroller/bike cart and Chris just biked Bode over to Happy Isles.  He said the biking was one of his favorite parts of the whole trip, so next time I want to figure out how to get bikes for everyone up there.

Anyway, we schlepped Bode and Geneva up to the Mist Trail and were there by noon thanks to the early rising.  I pushed Bode in the jog stroller and Chris carried/cajoled Geneva up that amazingly steep trail.  For the actual stairs part I carried Bode (Chris still carried Geneva) and I was very grateful that I have been doing so much running because it still seemed like a pretty easy hike in spite of all that extra weight.

After hiking we took another bus (Chris and Bode biked) over to the base of Yosemite Falls so that the folks who hadn't yet seen it could do so.  After Yosemite Falls we went back to Curry Village, ate pizza, and then finally headed home and I was in bed at midnight.  This one day felt like one of the longest ones of my whole life.  Pretty good overall although I could have done without the midnight-5am parts especially.

So, note to me for the future: Bring bikes, Stay in Lower Pines (or probably Upper Pines), try to convince someone to come with us who doesn't want to hike and just wants to play in the river with Geneva.

And I really want to go stay at Yosemite for more than just a couple of days.  I want to hike in the back country to Clouds Rest and finally see Tuolumne and all these great places.  I would love to do it with the kids but I'm not optimistic about my ability to mesh my hiking style with Geneva's (I'm very go-get-em, she's very casual). Maybe Bode will be really gung-ho about hiking?  Or maybe it'll be a good time for the kids to go stay with grandparents.

Playing with the train set

Bode is 1, Geneva is 4 and 4 months.

I took Bode to his one year appointment today and it got me thinking about all the things I know about my kids that I think I'm never going to forget but I probably will.  So I'm going to try to write some of them down.

The week of his first birthday Bode started walking.  Just a few steps and just occasionally.  I was watching movies of Geneva at 11 months and she was already walking. I think Bode was so satisfied by crawling (and so good at it) that there has been no urgency with walking.  He's not saying much of anything either - just a bit of Dadadadada here and there, but part of me suspects that with such talkative other family members he just doesn't try to get a word edgewise.

Bode's primary interest in life is FOOD.  I'm pretty sure he eats more than Geneva does already and we spend a lot of time just feeding him.  I try to give him food he can pick up for himself so that I get a chance to eat also.  Also, if anyone else is eating, he wants some of it too.  He'll crawl up to people and pull himself up to standing and just look longingly at whatever they're eating.  This way he has gotten chocolate milkshake, pickles, hotdogs, etc.  It's fun to feed him because he'll just eat anything - just today he refused macaroni (too plain I think) while preferring pickles and black bean burgers.  He's not such a fan of spicy things or fizzy water though - seems to think these foods are trying to attack him and he puts his hand in his mouth to try to get them back out again.  Bode is also thirstier than Geneva ever was and it has taken us awhile to get trained that we need to have water on hand all the time for him.  Our relatives have warned us that he's going to be a teenager with a hollow leg and we better start saving now for the grocery bills.

Bode is a good sleeper - he sleeps 11-13 hours through the night most nights and also takes 2 1hr+ naps.  I do not remember Geneva ever being this good of a sleeper.  She has always seemed to need 2-3 hours less sleep per day than whatever the minimum recommendation for her age group is.  Back in October we tried sharing a room with Bode while we were in Bodega Bay for Jen's wedding and he slept (and therefore we slept) just awfully.  It was quite a bit better when we were in Idaho this past week.  We shared a room with him and all pretty much got our normal sleep although I think I slept more lightly with him in the room.  It's handy to be able to share a room in a pinch though.

Basically Bode is just a very sweet, mellow baby.  He's happy as long as he's eating or doing something active.  He seems to have recognized Chris as his dad before I remember Geneva ever doing so.  If Chris comes home from work and doesn't hug Bode, Bode will cry and try to follow him.  He seems to go greet other people pretty easily and not be overly attached to me, which is certainly handy, although there have been some signs recently that he's starting to be more attached.  For example when we were packing up the cabin in McCall to come back to Boise, Bode was freaking out whenever I set him down.  Once I put him in the baby backpack he was fine - we think he was worried about being left behind or something.

Geneva is something else.  We've been reading the Clementine books with her and one of the recent ones we read posited that every family has an "easy one" and a "hard one."  It's pretty clear to me which is which at the moment.  Having a new brother seems to have brought on a round of ugly tantrums but I've been using the techniques in the book "Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids" and it seems to have helped.  By reconnecting with her more, trying to not punish and not let her be alone with her emotions we have evened out the worst of it but there's still a lot of whining and crying.

Geneva the opposite of her brother in many ways.  She is a very picky eater and often we spend a lot of time trying to persuade her to eat something. Anything!  I'd just let her go hungry but of course that causes other problems (such as can't get her to go to sleep because she says she's starving. What are you going to do, force your kid to go to sleep with no dinner? I don't have the will to take that hard of a line).  She eats primarily the most plain, colorless foods you can think of.  Nothing with odd textures, nothing too speckled.  McDonalds chicken nuggets are her favorite (cringe).

Geneva also doesn't really like to sleep much.  She typically sleeps 10pm-7am with a 1 hour nap.  We still have to have a sleep clock for her because otherwise she would be up before 7am for sure.  Her favorite thing to do is play with what I've taken to calling the "disaster box."  Because about 5 minutes after I get it down for her the house is a disaster.  This is a box with scrap paper, scissors, crayons, markers, glue, tape, old catalogs, etc.  She loves to make collages and random other stuff - mostly starting by cutting up lots of paper.  It's the paper scraps that get all over the place.  Part of me wishes I could forbid it but it's so clearly her favorite activity that I just try to not get too worked up about the mess.  Geneva also really likes to play outside on the playground and ride on the tag-along bike.  It's often very difficult to get her out the door (she whines and cries that she doesn't want to put on clothes/leave the house/etc) but as soon as she's outside her whole attitude changes and now she's really reluctant to come in.

She's starting to be able to read a few words.  She might have a couple of sight words and she can sound out lots of other words (cat, dog, stuff like that) but in general she doesn't seem to understand why she would want to learn to read when so many other people are perfectly willing to read to her.

Geneva really loves all her grandparents - I'm sure at least in part because they spoil her by pulling her out of school for fun activities and buy her junk food.  What are grandparents for, after all?  She's not quite as great with our au pair Yenny.  She is impatient with their communication difficulties and seems inclined to forget her manners quite badly and want to leave Yenny out of family events or just plain be rude to her.  We always correct her but she's seldom penitent.  

I'm sure there's other qualities of the kids I'll think of to write about.  I'll just add them on as I think about them.

Hellyer 2013

Here I am doing my t-rex impression.

Ski trip

So last weekend we went on our first ski trip since Bode was born. Actually it was my first skiing since I was pregnant with him and the skiing was GREAT. The snow was perfect and it just felt really good to get on the slopes. Unfortunately basically everything else about the trip was a fiasco.

I have off work on Fridays so around noon I left the house for Tahoe. I assumed that I could make the trip feel easier by making lots of stops to break things up. We stopped and picked up a ski helmet in San Francisco. We stopped for a tour of the Jelly Belly factory. We stopped at REI and bought Geneva ski goggles and some passes to Sugar Bowl. We arrived in Tahoe around 9pm and you know what? It just felt like I'd been in the car for 9 hours. Ugh.

Skiing seems to just inherently have a lot of gear and stuff to lug around. Combine that with the fact that babies have a lot of stuff to lug around and we basically filled up two cars. Thank goodness our friends Scot and Lauren wanted to come with us and had space in their truck because we could not possibly have done it otherwise.

Geneva and I were both so excited that we could barely sleep the days before the trip so you can probably imagine what good moods we were in. She seemed to really enjoy the skiing though - especially the stopping for snacks parts. After her second day of skiing we came back to the cabin and she was sulking big time because I wouldn't buy her a new iPad game. I sent her off to the couch until she could be in a nice mood again. Turns out a nap would be necessary for that to happen.

We took Bode to the ski hill on Saturday but that was a mistake also. He wasn't allowed on the chair lift (they allowed us to take Geneva on the lifts at Brundage). He seemed to enjoy looking around though and while I watched him on Saturday Yenny got a chance to ski and she seemed to have a great time!

All in all it was a great example of Type 2 fun (not that fun at the time, but lots of fun in retrospect). And the skiing was great. And it has really whet my appetite for our March trip!

Bode's first word

Chris and I were so amazed when Bode said his first word a couple of days ago but I should preface this with a few things. First, Bode is not much of a babbler. He makes some noises (kind of "eh eh" type stuff) but not syllables. No mama or baba or dada. None of that. Second, our cats have been pretty sick recently. Porky had his eye practically glued shut with pink eye and both cats have some sort of laryngitis. Porky can't speak at all and Marie just makes weird hacking noises when she has something to say. Anyway, Chris and I were in the kitchen a couple of days ago and I asked Bode "Do you want a cracker?" while holding up a Trader Joe's brand Ritz. He responded with "cra-ca." I was just floored and almost didn't think it was him except Chris turned around and said "Bode said his first word!" Later though we both confessed that we part thought it was the cat. Thankfully I got him to repeat it later in the evening and so we can be sure it was him saying it. It's a mark of how unlikely him speaking seems to be that Chris and I thought it was almost as likely that the cat was saying cracker.